Pocketburgers.com: Jul 23, 2010

Friday, July 23, 2010

The 15 Best Re-cut Movie Trailers

by Jerod

We are currently in the midst of July’s dog days, with August’s dog days just around the corner. What that means, from a sports perspective, is that almost nothing important is going on right now.

Sure, Sweet Lou announced yesterday that he’s stepping down at year’s end. Yes, the Chicago White Sox won again (in the process extending their AL Central lead to 3.5 games after being 9.5 out back in June). And I’m sure there are other tidbits of sports info we could talk about.

But really, until baseball hits September and we get closer to preseason NFL football and college football’s kickoff weekend, the sports world is a pretty boring place.

However, at MSF we refuse to remain beholden to the currently barren sports calendar. That is why, like yesterday, I am going totally off-topic this morning in my daily quest to entertain you. If sports can’t do it, well, that’s what pointless (but clever!) Internet memes are for.

One of the most clever and entertaining memes I’ve come across is the practice of re-cutting famous movies to create new, usually wonderfully ironic trailers.

I tip my hat to Jimmy Traina, the Grand Poobah of SI’s Hot Clicks, who has featured two such re-cut trailers from Seinfeld. I loved those so much I decided to dig into YouTube and find out what other such videos might exist.

Much to my surprise, considering how time consuming these videos must be to make, there are a ton of them. I really shouldn’t be surprised though, because when Al Gore created the Internet he created a place that never, ever lets us down in our search for constant entertainment.

Since there is nothing better to this morning (except for actual, you know, work…HA!), I have painstakingly watched as many of these re-cut trailers as I could find, sifted through the crap, and will now proudly present you with the following list of the best re-cut movie trailers.

We’ll start out with the videos that introduced me to this meme, from everyone’s favorite 90s sitcom Seinfeld, and then end with what have to be the two best (a statement I have no doubt that KVB will agree with).

Seinfeld Re-cut Movie Trailer: George

Seinfeld Re-Cut Movie Trailer: Serenity Now

There is also a horror movie trailer for Seinfeld too. I didn’t think that one was as good, but you can click here to watch it if you like.

Sticking with TV, there is a terrific “Halloween” version of The Office. This one is especially well done.

The Office Re-cut Movie Trailer: Halloween

If you’re a fan of The Office, there is also a 300 version. I don’t like it as much as the Halloween version, but it’s still pretty funny. Click here to view.

Moving away from TV into movieland, I’m sure that you have seen The Shining…but have you seen romantic comedy version of it?

The Shining Re-Cut Movie Trailer: Romantic Comedy Version

This next one actually isn’t that far off from the original as it re-imagines Willy Wonka as a powerful drug kingpin…which he kind of was in the original version.

Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory Re-cut Movie Trailer

And if you needed any more evidence for how important music is to setting the tone of a movie, watch this trailer for Scary Mary, the horror version of Mary Poppins.

Mary Poppins Re-cut Move Trailer: Scary Mary

Need more evidence of the importance of music? Check out Sleepless in Seattle (the Fatal Attraction version).

Sleepless in Seattle Re-cut Movie Trailer: Fatal Attraction Version

And, of course, it goes both ways. There is also the comedic version of Shawshank Redemption…

Shawshank Redemption Re-cut Movie Trailer: Comedy Version

And while this really is sacrilege, because Shawshank is one of the 10 best movies of all time, with no debate necessary or possible, I have to include this one. It’s Shawshank again…but with Red and Andy getting even closer than they do in the original.

Shawkshank Redemption Re-cut Movie Trailer: Bromance Edition

And while we’re in the Bleachers at Wrigley, I might as well include the romantic Top Gun in which Maverick and Iceman become a little more than friends.

Top Gun Re-cut Movie Trailer: Probably What Actually Happened on Set Edition

And before I reveal the final trio of videos that comprise my personal best of the best, here are a couple of others I thought we worth including:

Home Alone Re-cut Movie Trailer: Horror Edition

Forrest Gump Re-cut Movie Trailer: Forrest Goes Nuts Edition

And finally, perhaps the crowning achievement for the intrepid Internetpreneurs who spent their valuable time making these videos are the following three.

When you can turn a comedy classic like Dumb and Dumber into a horror movie, or make it seem emotional and dramatic, well, that’s just trailer editing at its absolute best.

Dumb and Dumber Re-cut Movie Trailer: Horror Edition

Dumb and Dumber Re-cut Movie Trailer: Emotional Edition

Dumb and Dumber Re-cut Movie Trailer: Overly Dramatic Edition

If you want still more, here are a few others that didn’t make the cut:

As always, if there are any that I missed, don’t hesitate to post links in the comment section.

Email the author of this post: jerod@midwestsportsfans.com

5 Movies More Complicated Than Inception

Published by Madison

From: http://unrealitymag.com/

I suppose that this is somehow, unofficially, “Inception week” here at Unreality, what with seemingly half our posts somehow related to Christopher Nolan’s latest film. The concepts of idea inception and dreams within dreams aren’t your everyday, run-0f-the-mill plot devices, and for a summer blockbuster, they’re about as complex and layered as you’ll see. Still, Inception is really not that complicated, especially considering that Nolan holds your hand and gives you a tutorial via dialogue for the first third of the movie. Here are five movies that are, in my opinion, far more complicated than Inception.

Primer

Time loops and time paradoxes can be confusing, but Primer twists timelines so many times that it’s nearly impossible to fully grasp what’s going on the first time you see this movie. Or the second, for that matter. There are multiple Abes and Aarons running around, some trying to get rich, others trying not to screw up time, and others trying to prevent past versions of themselves from screwing up time. It’s dizzying to say the least, and easily one of the most complicated movies I’ve ever seen. Some people have actually created timelines to chart exactly what’s going on, but even with that help, it’s damn confusing. See for yourself by clicking HERE.

Mulholland Drive

I suppose I could have filled this list with David Lynch movies, but Mulholland Drive stood out the most. The story is anything but linear, filled with symbolism, and, like Inception, deals with dreams and projections. Overall, Lynch’s tale of Betty Elms and her amnesiac friend can be described as totally surreal. Not helping matters is the fact that, as is his usual custom, Lynch has not revealed exactly what his film was supposed to mean, leaving it open to interpretation. If anyone’s got a good theory on this one, I’d love to hear it.

Donnie Darko

Richard Kelly’s best (and only good) movie is Donnie Darko, a tale of tangent universes, sleepwalking, time travel, and giant talking rabbits (sort of). After a few viewings, Donnie’s destiny starts to become clear, but exactly what his role is in the universe and how time travel works can’t be fully appreciated without doing some research outside of the movie. How convoluted and complex is Donnie Darko? Even Richard Kelly himself has stated that he doesn’t fully understand it and that it is open to many interpretations.

2001: A Space Odyssey

2001 isn’t so much complicated as it is layered and complex, but that’s what you’d expect from a Kubrick film - especially one in which the story spans thousands of years. From Moonwatcher’s learning to use tools, to the signal from the moon, from HAL’s breakdown, to the presence of the Star Child at the film’s finale - all overshadowed by the mysterious monolith - there are seemingly endless images and symbols to interpret. The best way to understand 2001 is to read the book (which does vary from the film, but the same themes are present) or, even better, to read interviews with Kubrick and hear it straight from the man himself.

Memento

One of Nolan’s greatest strengths as a storyteller is his ability to structure his films unconventionally, and I’d argue that the best example of this is not Inception, but rather, Memento, a story that is, for the most part, told from end to beginning. I don’t think that Memento is unbearably complicated, but it’s certainly the type of movie that one can watch passively and still expect to understand everything that’s going on. I’m confident I fully understand Memento - and always have - but judging by the comments on one of my past articles, it seems that not everyone agrees.

Do you find the above movies complicated? Which movies had you pondering their meanings long after you watched them? Let me know in the comments section.

BlindType vows to autocorrect all wrongs with your iPhone or Android virtual keyboard (video)

By Vlad Savov

From: http://www.engadget.com/

718diggsdiggRemember that episode of The Simpsons where Homer gets too fat to be able to dial a number? Well, he wouldn't have had that problem had BlindType been around. This soft keyboard is described by its makers as being extremely resilient to inaccurate input and looking at the demo video after the break, you kinda have to agree -- it seems to have a pretty kickass predictive algorithm. Aside from that, the keyboard also dynamically adjusts to wherever and however you choose to type, meaning its size and orientation track along to your input, which goes some way to justifying the somewhat odd name (it's meant for blind operation, not blind people). Text can be inserted without the keyboard even being on screen, while spaces are added by swiping to the right. BlindType should be coming to Android and iOS devices some time in the near future.

[Thanks, Fadl]

Update: We asked BlindType's makers whether implementing their software will require replacing Apple's default button slate and they've confirmed that it would. They're making and submitting it for iOS use, nonetheless, "to put pressure on Apple to finally allow this kind of thing."

BlindType

I am Your Banker: Darth Vader Robs Bank (Photos, Oh Yes, Photos)

By John Del Signore
From: http://gothamist.com/

It seems the Empire has fallen on hard times. Presumably to get finishing funds for his latest Death Star, Darth Vader—or a man pretending to be Darth Vader?—was reduced to robbing a bank on Long Island this morning. Impotent Rebel Alliance security forces tell Newsday (paywall) that Vader marched into a Chase bank in Setauket around 11:30 a.m. today. Brandishing a completely unnecessary handgun—as he had the power to choke the oxygen out every teller's throat—the fallen Jedi demanded cash.

It's unclear whether he also found their lack of faith disturbing, but one Rebel policeman says, "The teller complied with the robber's demands and gave him money from the drawer." Vader is described as 6 feet, 2 inches tall, also wearing camouflage pants, and was last seen boarding a starfighter headed in the direction of Long Island's sinister Sith stronghold, in Valley Stream. (Isn't this also where Improv Everywhere has their headquarters?) Below, a surveillance photo from the teller's point of view:

10 Spectacular Sand Sculpting Festivals

See which U.S. beaches become artists' canvases every summer

By Brynn Mannino

from WomansDay.com

While most people see summer as a chance for some fun in the sun, swimming and tanning aren't the only things going on at the beach. In fact, each year, artists from all over the globe meet in the sand to show off their sculpting skills—whether they're professional artists hoping to make it to the World Championship of Sand Sculpting come September or amateurs just in it for fun. WD decided to get in on the excitement and scoped out the biggest festivals across the United States.

Texas Sandfest

This Southern sand extravaganza, which runs in April and attracts 100,000 spectators, is a three-day competition hosted in Port Aransas, Texas. The competitors always bring their A game, since it’s a qualifying competition for the World Championship of Sand Sculpting. But the event isn't just for veterans: A one-day amateur showing attracts nearly 200 novices. Photo: "Time Frame" by Karen Fralich of Ontario, Canada; 1st place; courtesy of Kristie Woodworth.

Siesta Sand Sculpture Contest

Held in Sarasota, Florida, each May, this festival attracts nearly 40 entries per year. Host to some of the funniest categories, including Adult Humorous and Adult Miscellaneous, Siesta Key Beach is transformed into a canvas of comical artwork. Photo: "Siesta Fish" by Libby Bennet and Lara Hines of Sarasota, Florida; People's Choice Award and 2nd Place, Adult Humorous; courtesy of Anne Johnson.

Piccolo Spoleto Sand Sculpting Competition

Every year around Memorial Day (the exact date depends on the tide), Isle of Palms, South Carolina, puts on one of the largest festivals in the U.S. Attracting 64 teams this year, the event includes the Most Realistic and Best Architectural categories, inspired by one of the sponsors, the American Institute of Architecture. Photo: "Raining Cats and Dogs" by Jeff Mahaffey of Hanahan, South Carolina; Best in Show; courtesy of Will McElheny.

Beach Community Bank Fiesta Sand Sculpture Contest

Entries were low this year due to the oil spill, but the Pensacola, Florida–based sand sculpture competition still produced incredible results, made possible by its renowned white sand beaches. Open to professionals and amateurs alike, the festival takes place in early June, and garners about 50 entries each year. Photo: "Close Encounter" by Chuck and Tammy Kunze of Milton, Florida; 1st place; courtesy of Whitney Vaughan Fike.

Chamber Sand Sculpture Contest

Every June in Grand Haven, Michigan, approximately 40 teams and over 200 individuals get two hours to turn the Lake Michigan shoreline into an art exhibit. This year, to the delight of spectators, the Sand Castle category was added to the competition. Photo: "Jabba the Hutt" by Sand Carvers and Kevin DiMeglio of Grand Rapids, Michigan; 2nd Place, Family Category; courtesy of Jenna Paparella.

Nebraska Children’s Home Society’s Sand in the City

Sand in the City is an active charity that, through its annual sand sculpting event, helps nonprofits learn how to raise money. One such charity is Nebraska Children's Home, which transforms its parking lot each June with 350 tons of sand for the 12 teams of sculptors. Photo:“Mama Said There’d Be Days Like This” by Millard Drywall Service, led by Joe Kirkendall, Omaha, Nebraska; 1st Place; courtesy of Kathleen Al-Marhoon.

Hampton Beach Master Sand Sculpting Competition

One of five World Championship qualifiers in the U.S, this New Hampshire–based competition has approximately 15 world-class master sculptors vying for $15,000 in prize money. Held in late June, the contest also boasts nighttime viewing hours, during which the awe-inspiring works are illuminated. Photo: "It's Not a Yolk" by Justin Garden of Grover, Massachusetts; 1st Place; courtesy of Greg Grady.

New England Sand Sculpting Festival

Held at Revere Beach in Revere, Massachusetts, every July, the NESSF, which hosts 10 artists annually, was originally the largest of its kind. According to the website, it is still regarded as a premiere event for sand sculpting thanks to national coverage by various media outlets, including Good Morning America, TODAY and The New York Times. Photo: "Selfish Trap" by Jonathan "Jobi" of Bouchard, Montreal, Canada; 1st place; courtesy of Adam Benoit, Celebrity Marketing, Inc.

Sandsations Sand Sculpture Contest

From mid to late July, Long Beach, Washington, hosts this unique festival, which boasts a slew of fun activities for spectators—including free sculpting lessons, a beach bonfire and the Sand Flea Pet Parade—while the 45 to 50 competitors create their magic. Photo: "Evolve" by Eric Hawley, Tacoma, Washington; courtesy of Becky Johnson..

American Sandsculpting Championship Festival

Held in Fort Meyers, Florida, every November, this competition sends its winner on to compete in the following year’s World Championships. Drawing in top master sculptors, the contest is free to all, but those who want a closer look must purchase VIP passes. Photo: "Mirage" by Thomas Koet of Melbourne, Florida; courtesy of Earl Quenzel with Quenzel & Associates.

Why Didn't I Think of That? The Wine Rack, Already a Breast-Seller

This summer's must-have accessory? The Wine Rack, a bra that holds an entire bottle of wine. Guys, don't worry -- there's a version for you too.

By Geoff Williams
From http://smallbusiness.aol.com/

Thirsty? The Wine Rack bra stores 25 ounces of your favorite beverage.

The latest heatwave has helped sales of all things summer -- electric fans, air conditioners, flip flops and more. Add to that list the Wine Rack, which has been selling briskly among college students as the temperatures climb.

The Wine Rack isn't quite what it sounds like. It's a bra -- a bra that can hold an entire bottle of wine or 25 ounces of your beverage of choice.

The booze bra comes with a straw for sipping, and thanks to the watertight tubing, it can inflate a woman's chest by two sizes. Take that, Wonderbra.

"It's an idea whose time had come," says Paul Krasulja, general manager of Paterson, N.J.-based online site BaronBob.com, which specializes in selling off-beat gifts. "It had been coming for a long time."

No kidding. The Wine Rack has been on the market for at least three years, but thanks to us poor saps in the media who just love writing about it, business remains brisk. It's a great strategy for small companies with catchy products and slim advertising budgets.

"That's pretty much exactly how it happens," Krasulja says. "Everybody picks it up, writes about it, it boosts the sales of the item, and then after a month or two, it all dies down."

But it's easy to see why the public is fascinated with it. The Wine Rack dovetails with the American male's interest in alcohol and women. As it turns out, the idea for the Wine Rack was actually inspired by a guy's version -- the Beerbelly, which holds 80 ounces of beer.

The Beerbelly and Wine Rack were both created by serial entrepreneur Brooks Lambert, a 50-year-old Californian who came up with the idea when he and a pal were hanging out in his backyard, remembering how they used to sneak beer into ball games and movies. Suddenly, he had an idea.

Brooks ultimately sold the manufacturing rights to Aaron Knirr, 31, and his business partner, Chris Pounds, 34, who co-own Cooler Fun, based in Ellisville, Mo.

"This is awesome, let's jump on it," recalls Knirr, who ordered a few prototypes. In 2008, they made an offer to purchase Lambert's equipment and assets, so they could become the main distributor and manufacturer of both the Beerbelly and Wine Rack.

Knirr won't say how many Beerbelly and Wine Racks have been sold, but he says "sales are decent." After several years of being mostly an Internet sales phenomenon, the products are now appearing in a few scattered liquor stores and other small retailers across the country, with the possibility of rolling out to larger chains in the future. The publicity -- the Wine Rack has been featured on the Today show, and by countless other media outlets -- has definitely helped sales, along with word of mouth, Knirr says.

Knirr cites one of his favorite testimonials, where one guy wrote in to rave, "The Beerbelly is quite possibly the best product ever invented in the world ever -- as good as, if not better than the wheel, the light bulb, sliced bread and the Internet."

Some people clearly love their beer.

Meanwhile, Krasulja says the customers he has talked to over the phone mostly seem to be getting the Wine Rack and Beerbelly for sporting events, although he recently had a female customer who said she was using the Wine Rack when attending PTA meetings.

As for sipping beer out of a bra or a belly harness during those sporting events, "When you're spending $11 on a beer at Yankee Stadium, it's easy to see why they want it," Krasulja says. "I went to the stadium last year and spent $290 on beer. It's an amazing, beautiful stadium, but [the beer is] overpriced."

Geoff Williams is a regular contributor to AOL Small Business. He is also the co-author of the book Living Well with Bad Credit.

Baby's Life Saved After Holes in Brain Plugged With 'Super Glue' small text medium text large text

By Catherine Donaldson-Evans

From: http://www.aolhealth.com/

The life of a 6-month-old twin girl has been saved after doctors stopped a brain defect using medical-grade "Super Glue."

The Chicago baby, Joely Finkelstein, was born with a potentially deadly brain abnormality in which the blood vessels in her head weren't properly formed, according to CBS 2 News in New York City.

The backup of fluids led to a very dangerous condition known as hydrocephalus, or water on the brain -- which caused her head to grow unusually large and numerous veins to pop out in her scalp when she was only a few months old. Her twin brother Jared didn't share her birth defect.

An MRI revealed that Joely's disorder was a "vein of Galen malformation," which produces a dark circle in the middle of the brain that cuts off circulation between various arteries and veins. The syndrome causes those veins to enlarge and prevents fluid in the brain from being able to drain normally.

Doctors told her parents the infant had to come to the emergency room right away. The Finkelsteins found an expert in the condition, Dr. Alejandro Berenstein, during their research online and flew to New York City, where he performed a procedure to fix Joely's brain.

He inserted a micro-catheter through an artery in the baby's groin that pushed all the way up to her head to correct the vein malformation. He then plugged up the vessels feeding the abnormal vein with small quantities of a type of medical grade Super Glue.

"We know that before the availability of these techniques to treat these children, it was nearly a fatal disease," Berenstein told CBS. "There was practically a 95 percent chance of dying before the end of the first year of life and maybe less than 5 percent to have a normal child by the end of 10 years."

Joely underwent two treatments to remedy the situation, and the malformation was already shrinking in size after the first one, according to X-ray results.

"Her eyes looked brighter, her coloring looked better," said her mother, Darby Finkelstein. "She just looked like a different baby. It was really quite amazing."

The malfunctioning vein has been almost completely closed off since the baby's second procedure. Doctors predict that slowly, her head will return to its normal size and the water on her brain will continue to drain away.

"She really, personality-wise, turned into this happy, charming little baby who will ham it up for anybody that looks at her," her mother said. "And that was not her pre-surgery personality."

The Most Clever Jewelry Store Billboard Ever

From: http://picchore.com/

Image source: Imgur

How One Jellyfish Stung 100 People

Jeanna Bryner
LiveScience Managing Editor

livescience.com

How can one jellyfish sting up to 100 people? With lots of stinger-equipped tentacles, the largest jellyfish in the world is apparently up to the job.

Reported Wednesday at Wallis Sands State Beach in Rye, N.H., between 50 and 100 beachgoers were treated for jellyfish stings likely from a lion's mane jellyfish (Cyanea capillata). Though officials can't be certain one jellyfish stung all the people, it seems likely as that's the only giant they spotted nearby.

This species is typically found in the cooler regions of the Pacific Ocean, Atlantic Ocean, North Sea and Baltic Sea. And they rarely show up on this beach. "I haven't seen anything like this in my life, said Brian Warburton, who has been with the New Hampshire State Parks department for six years.

All the action transpired in about 20 minutes, when Warburton and his colleagues administered first aid (vinegar treatment). "There wasn't time to sit and measure this thing. We just got rid of it," he told LiveScience. "Think about a glob of Jell-O you're trying to pick up with two hands," he said, explaining the need for a pitchfork to pick it up.

When the 40-pound (18-kilogram) jellyfish arrived near shore, it appeared to be dead. But even a dead animal or a detached tentacle can sting a person, according to the University of Michigan Museum of Zoology.

And the lion's mane isn't lacking in that arena.

The lion's mane jellyfish's sports a disk-shaped bell that can reach some 3.2 feet (1 meter) across, with its trailing thin tentacles extending more than 32 feet (10 m), according to the Australian Museum. Eight clusters of 150 tentacles each hang from the underside of its body.

Like other jellyfish, the lion's mane's tentacles are equipped with nematocysts, or capsules that contain a trigger and stinging structure. A single tentacle can be armed with hundreds or thousands of nematocysts, which get activated upon making contact with an object like a person's legs, according to the South Carolina Department of Natural Resources.

When spread out, the tentacles of the lion's mane jellyfish form a net-like trap through which only the teensiest animals can pass. In fact, this tangle of tentacles is often difficult for swimmers to avoid, which can mean painful stings for many, according to the Australian Museum.

Warburton said he didn't think the stings were too bad, though perhaps they seemed painful for children who aren't used to getting stung.

Original Story: How One Jellyfish Stung 100 People

Woman attacked by bison: 'I thought I was going to die'

By Nick Valencia, CNN

(CNN) -- A woman gored by a bison at Yellowstone National Park in Wyoming said she is happy to be alive days after the attack.

"I thought it was the end," Cathy Hayes told CNN by phone late Wednesday.

Hayes said she was vacationing in Yellowstone on Monday with her husband and a friend. The group was driving through the park when they spotted a bison.

"My friend is from California, and had never seen a bison before," she said. "So we pulled over and went to get a closer look."

Minutes later, the bison attacked. And it was all caught on tape.

"So we're here in the park and there's a buffalo, and he's just wandering across the road," she says in the footage.

Hayes, a native of Farr West, Utah, says they were about 30 feet away from the bison when her friend decided to get closer.

"There was another group in front of us, and I never noticed it before looking at the video on my small camera, but you can see a stick fly off the back of the bison," she said. "It looks like it came from the group that was in front of him. Before that, the bison was just chillin.'"

In the video shot from Hayes' perspective, her friend falls as he runs away from the charging bison. At that point, she says, the bison turned its attention to her.

Hayes crouched behind a tree to protect herself, but it wasn't enough.

"There was a pause when I could tell that he was backing up and getting ready to ram the tree again," Hayes said. "I thought, 'He won't ram the car,' so I made a run for it. You can probably see in the video when he got me and flung me up in the air."

Hayes' husband was in their car when the attack happened, and was able to scare the bison off by making loud noises.

"He was going to throw his cell phone at it, but it took off. It was gone as quick as it came," she said.

Luckily, Hayes did not suffer life-threatening injures, but said she is still in a lot of pain. Her knee was swollen to the size of a football, and she had minor cuts and scrapes throughout her leg.

Her friend broke his shoulder when he tripped and fell.

But for the Utah teacher, it could have been worse.

"I was waiting for black. I thought I was going to die," Hayes said.

Signs throughout Yellowstone warn visitors to not get close to wildlife.

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Friday, July 23, 2010