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Showing posts with label feature. Show all posts
Showing posts with label feature. Show all posts

Friday, June 5, 2009

Windows 7 Versus Mac OS X Leopard: The Feature-by-Feature Showdown

Now that we know Windows 7 will go on sale October 22nd and the feature-complete release candidate is available as a free download, it's time to put it through its paces: as compared to the current state of the Mac.

Oh, I know: the Mac versus PC debate is so played out. Perhaps, but dumb commercials aside, if you're deciding between buying a Mac or a PC in the coming months, it helps to know what you're getting from one or the other. I use both a Mac and a PC every day of the week, and both systems have their strong and weak points.

Note that I'm basing my observations on the Windows 7 Ultimate Release Candidate 1 (Build 7100) and Mac OS X Leopard 10.5.7. You could argue that I really should be comparing Windows 7 to the upcoming Snow Leopard, and you'd be right. If I had a copy of Snow Leopard to run I'd do that. Alas. As always, take all comments salted with a few grains of "this is all one person's opinion" and "what I should get depends on what I need." Also, remember to breathe. Let's do this.

Mac Finder versus Windows Explorer—A Draw

I've always thought that the default interface for dealing with files in every major operating system could improve, and given both Windows 7 and Mac OS X Leopard, I still feel that way. Both Finder and Windows Explorer offer pretty much the same features, with a few exceptions (like Finder's Sidebar and Places, and now Windows 7's Libraries). Still, I want a tabbed interface and Quicksilver-y file manipulation built into my OS, and neither Explorer or Finder offers that. Since I'm pretty "meh" on both of these, we're calling this one a draw.

Leopard's Quick Look versus Windows File Preview—Winner: Quick Look

The one feature of Leopard's Finder which is super-useful for most common document types is Quick Look. Select a file, tap the keyboard, and bang, you're peering into the contents of a file, whether it's a Word document, PDF, or image. In Windows 7 Explorer you can hit the Alt+P keyboard combination to preview the contents of a file in an embedded panel inside the Explorer interface (too small). This preview feature doesn't support nearly the amount of filetypes that Quick Look does and lacks Quick Look's separate window resizing and paging capabilities.

Windows Taskbar versus Mac Dock—Winner: Windows 7 Taskbar

The new Windows 7 taskbar is no doubt the best improvement interface-wise to your system. Now you can pin programs to your taskbar (ironically, Dock-style), but you've also got jumplists and Aero Peek rollover previews (which work for multiple windows AND tabs) and the ever-handy Show Desktop button that pulls the taskbar ahead of Mac's Dock. In the Dock's defense, the Windows 7 taskbar does lack a Stacks equivalent.

Windows System Tray vs Mac Menu Bar—Winner: Windows 7 System Tray

The Mac menu bar is an odd bird: it's fixed to the top of your Mac's screen with no easy way to hide it, and programs affix their icons there without asking you (or by burying the option to hide them somewhere in the individual program's preferences). The default date and time display isn't that informative, either. Compared to Windows 7's one-click full calendar, and your ability to easily customize what icons live there in one place, Windows 7 takes this one. (See more about that icon customization in item #6 in the top 10 things to look forward to in Windows 7.)

Leopard's Time Machine vs Windows Backup—Winner: Leopard's Time Machine

Not too much has changed with Windows 7's built-in backup utility: it's a plain old wizard that asks you to choose a backup drive, choose the files you want to back up (along with an option to make an OS system image), and set the schedule. It's buried somewhere in the Control Panel and the whole business of using it is boring and easy to ignore. But Leopard's Time Machine? Nothing beats its dead-simple setup and over-animated but really-fun restore interface.

Windows 7 Aero Peek versus Exposé? (Not Quick Look or Stacks)—Winner: Aero Peek

I admit it: I'm currently deep in a love affair with Windows 7's Aero Peek feature, which does all this beautiful thumbnail previewing and window clearing and docking—but not in an overwrought, show-offy way, more in a smooth, utilitarian, why-doesn't-every-computer-do-this way. Currently Mac OS X doesn't offer a feature that one could compare to Aero Peek. Update: Reader OMG! Memez! (Dafrety) rightfully points out that you could kinda-sorta compare Aero Peek to Leopard's Exposé. Even doing that, Aero Peek still wins, hands down.

Update: Here's a quick screencast of Aero Peek in action when you're using Windows 7's Alt+Tab feature.


We Could Go On...

We've hit on the biggies already, but the list of items one could compare between Windows 7 and Leopard goes on. There's Safari 4 versus Internet Explorer 8, Windows Media Player 12 versus iTunes/Front Row, Leopard's Boot Camp versus Windows 7 XP Mode (though that's not exactly apples to apples), Windows User Account Control versus Leopard's user security, and Windows Search versus Spotlight, update: as well as Bonjour versus Windows Homegroup (thanks mynamesafad).

Also, both operating systems boast more features that don't have direct parallels, like Leopard's extra utilities (e.g. Preview and iChat), Spaces, and Windows 7's themes, built-in software uninstaller, games, and multi-touch support. Of course, no Mac versus Windows article would be complete without mentioning that more games and viruses exist for Windows than for Mac.

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Five Best Netbooks

If you're thinking about picking up an ultra-portable laptop, this week's Hive Five is a great spot to start your comparison shopping. These are the netbooks are those most loved by Lifehacker readers. Photo by nDevilTV.

Earlier this week we asked you to share your favorite netbook with us. We've tallied the votes and we're back to share the top five netbooks. While every Hive Five covers things that are closely related, netbooks are known for being particularly close in description. If you're using this list as a spring board for a potential netbook purchase, we'd urge you to focus on the usability details when comparing different netbooks. Something as simple as a particular netbook having a 93% sized keyboard instead of an 80% sized keyboard can be the thing that makes up your entire relationship with your new netbook. The difference between 1.33 GHz and 1.6GHz processors, on the other hand, won't be as noticeable or aggravating as a weirdly placed shift key or a too-small trackpad. Without further ado, the top five netbooks:

Samsung NC10 ($399)

The Samsung NC10 is a stylish little netbook, with obvious thought put into little things like the layout of the LED indicators and power button. The keyboard is 93% the size of a standard laptop keyboard and has silver particles embedded into the keys to make them anti-bacterial. The touch pad has a dedicated section for scrolling, handy for a machine that will likely see a lot of web surfing. Hardware-wise, the NC10 sports a 1.6GHz Intel Atom processor, 1GB of RAM, 160GB HDD, WiFi b/g, bluetooth, a 1.3MP webcam and weighs in at 2.8 pounds.

Dell Mini 10 ($349)

The Mini 10, thanks to the clout of being marketed and distributed by Dell, has proven to be a popular netbook. The base models sport 1.33GHz Intel Atom processors, 1 GB RAM, 160GB HDD, Wi-Fi b/g, a 1.3MP webcam, a 10.1" display, and weighs in at 2.6 pounds. If you'd like to boost the specs up to the level of some of the other netbooks on today's list, you'll pay a chain of premiums to up the processor, add a six-cell battery, and add in Wi-Fi Draft-N and Bluetooth. One thing to consider when choosing between 1GB or 2GB of RAM is that the RAM is soldered onto the motherboard, making a future upgrade impossible. The Mini 10 has an HDMI port, but no VGA port, and can be upgraded to access to Verizon's EVDO network. Despite the drawback of having to pay a little extra to get features common on similar priced netbooks, if you're interested in making a hackintosh netbook, many people prefer the Dell Mini as an easy to use platform for installing OSX.

ASUS EEEPC 1000HE ($385)

When netbooks first appeared onto most peoples' radars, it was because of the earlier EEEPC models gaining surprising popularity several years ago. ASUS has continued to crank out rock-solid netbooks, building their reputation in large part to some of the longest battery lifes. While they claim 9.5 hours under ideal conditions, under real world conditions it's more like 6—still radically better than the 3 hours you can squeeze out of most netbooks. The 1000HE sports a 92% size keyboard and a 1.6GHz Intel Atom processor, 1GB RAM, 160GB HDD, 1.3MP webcam, 10.1" display, Wi-Fi b/g/n and Bluetooth for connectivity, and weighs in at 3.2 pounds. Every ASUS netbook comes with 10GB of online storage, free for 24 months after purchase.

Acer Aspire One ($349)

The recently revamped Aspire One now sports a bigger screen and a six cell battery for around 5 hours of run time. If you're planning on using your netbook for video conferencing or any webcam-dependent task, consider that the Aspire only sports a 0.3 MP webcam, with no option to upgrade. Other specs are more standard: 1.6GHz Intel Atom processor, 10.1" display, 1GB RAM, 160GB HDD, WiFi b/g, SD/MMC card reader, and a weight of 2.95 pounds. The Aspire can be upgraded to access WiMAX and 3G networks.

MSI Wind ($329)

The MSI Wind is another heavyweight in the battery department. It comes standard with a six cell battery and lays claim to the same lengthy battery life the Asus 1000 series touts. The Wind has an edge-to-edge keyboard with well-spaced keys. While many people complain about how tightly packed the keys are on netbook keyboards, the Wind keyboard has keys that travel a little deeper and are just slightly further spaced than most netbook keyboards, which really helps alleviate the feeling that you're typing on a keyboard made for elves. The included Face Locker software allows you to program your face into the computer, so whenever you're not sitting in front of the computer, it will automatically lock itself and go into power saver mode. The MSI Wind sports a 1.6GHz Intel Atom processor, 10.1" display, 1 GB RAM, 160 HHD, WiFi b/g, Bluetooth, 4-in-1 card reader, 1.3 MP webcam and weighs in at 3.2 pounds.


As we emphasized above, if you're fired up to go netbook shopping after perusing the Hive Five (or reading the 127th article about them in the tech press), make sure to pay attention to the details. In a world of fairly standardized 1.6GHz processors and 1.3MP webcams, it's the little details—the spacing of the keys, layout of the USB ports—that really make the difference in how comfortable your mini-mini-computer will be in actual use. If you can't get to a brick and mortar store to actually play around with the machines, try searching Google for comparison reviews and images of your top few choices. Many gadget and laptop review sites have pictures of comparable laptops stack on top of each other, side by side, and so forth so you can see if that extra .5" really matter to you.

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Ten Steps To Creating The Perfect Man Cave

The man cave. A mythical masculine lair filled with automotive goodies and toys designed to make a man happy. Here's how to create your very own man cave in ten easy steps.

Some may call it a garage. Some may even call it a workshop. But we know what it's really all about. It's about you and creating your very own secret lair designed to help you relax around your very own, hard-earned collection of man toys. Take a walk below through our ten steps to creating the perfect man cave, then give us your pictures of your own man cave in the comments below.


Thursday, May 14, 2009

Clean Up and Revive Your Bloated, Sluggish Mac

A few years back you dropped significant cash to switch over from the virus-laden world of Windows to a shiny new Mac, but over time it's gotten slow and crufty. Let's clean it up.


Before you get started uninstalling this and deleting that, do yourself a favor: hook up an external drive to your Mac and back everything up with Time Machine or any other free alternative. The last thing you want is for your "clean up" to turn into "holy crap where did all my Documents go."

Ready? Let's get started. (PC user? You want this article.)

Find the CPU and Memory Hogs in the Activity Monitor

First things first. If your Mac is acting like a petulant three-year-old, dragging its feet, crossing its arms, and refusing to do what you ask in any reasonable amount of time, it's time to fire up the Activity Monitor (in Applications > Utilities). Here you'll see a list of running applications and processes. Sort the columns shown in the screenshot to find out what apps are hogging the most CPU time (Firefox, in this case), what apps are for Intel or PowerPC (it's a good idea to use Intel-only apps on Intel Macs), and what apps are running at all. If there are processes running for software you don't need, note them down. Also, if an app is a runaway CPU and memory hog, quit it and restart for immediate relief.

Clean Up Your Startup

Whether or not the Activity Monitor is showing processes you don't recognize, it's a good idea to audit what programs start up automatically when you log onto your Mac. In System Preferences, Accounts (I know, unintuitive placement), click on the Login Items tab. From there, make sure each and every app listed is something you need and use. If it isn't? Just select it and click the minus (-) sign. (Rule of thumb: Generally you want to keep things called "SomethingHelper" where Something is an app you use, like iTunes or Growl, as shown.)


Uninstall Unneeded Apps (and Related Files)

Just like your Login Items, you want to cruise through your Applications folder and trash anything you don't need or use any more. To be clear, this won't speed up your Mac, but it will reclaim hard drive space.

Before you get to dragging and dropping unneeded applications to the trash, though, it's a good idea to install a, well, uninstaller program. Strangely Apple still hasn't shipped a proper uninstaller with Mac OS X, but a few free and pay-for apps will clear out related files when you send an application to the Trash. While the irony of having to install something in order to uninstall something isn't lost on us, keep in mind: your Mac will be fine if an extra plist file gets left behind by an app you once used.

But, in case you're a neat freak, you want to check out the likes of AppTrap (free, our review), AppDelete (used to be free, now requires a minimum payment of $5 after a few uses, our review), or AppZapper ($13, our review).

Personally I prefer Hazel, which will set you back $22 for a license—however, in addition to clearing away application files on uninstall, Hazel can make your Mac self-cleaning, too, which makes it worth the cost.


Do Some Maintenance

Now it's time to make sure your disks are in tip-top shape, and luckily, you can do this without any extra software. Simply run Disk Utility (in Applications > Utilities) to verify and repair disk permissions (which determine what apps can do what with what files on your Mac) and verify and repair the disk itself. These operations take some time, and you can't do them while other applications are running, so set 'em in motion before you head out to lunch or to grab coffee.


To run some more hardcore and detailed maintenance tasks, download the free OnyX (our review). While OnyX does lots of fun Mac customization (see the Parameters tab for that stuff), you want the Maintenance and Cleaning tabs. There you can do things like manually run your Mac's daily, weekly, and monthly maintenance scripts (which don't on their own if you shut down your Mac at night), and clear out log files and system caches. You can also fix system application-specific issues, by rebuilding Spotlight's or Mail's index, if those apps are acting particularly wonky.

Reclaim Hard Drive Space

While you're on a cleaning spree, figure out exactly what's taking up all that space on your Mac with a visual tool that maps what's what. Disk Inventory X (free, our review), is your best bet in this area: it creates what's called a "tree map" of your hard drive usage that will unearth things like 10 gigabytes of video files you just don't need any more.

To get down to the unneeded-megabyte level, Macworld has some detailed advice for where to find redundant system files and Dashboard widgets. You can also reclaim space taken up by unneeded language files using the free Monolingual (our review).

Care for and Troubleshoot Your Battery and Memory

If you've got a Mac notebook and you're having trouble with your battery, a few troubleshooting techniques might help. First, to get the longest life out of your battery, calibrate it to make sure your life-o-meter is giving you the right readings.

If your Mac's battery is cutting out before issuing the "You're running out of power" warning, you want to reset the SMC or PMU, which cleared up that very problem on my MacBook.

Finally, some problems can be resolved by resetting your Mac's PRAM and NVRAM—but this is generally a last-resort just-short-of-the-Genius-Bar troubleshooting technique for that inexplicable problem your Mac's having.


Beef Up Your Memory and Get the Latest System Updates

This should go without saying, but the more memory your Mac has, the snappier it will be. If you're thinking about an upgrade and you've got a MacBook, check out Adam's guide to adding RAM to your Mac.

Also, it's generally a good idea to stay up-to-date with OS X patches and versions—and normally Software Update runs on its own and does just that. (Note: Yesterday the 10.5.7 update came out, and while I had no problems with it, Gizmodo reports that some people are having issues. As always, back up your stuff continuously to avoid disaster.)

Got any tales of victory or defeat when it comes to cleaning up and speeding up your Mac? Tell 'em in the comments.

Gina Trapani, Lifehacker's founding editor, has a MacBook Pro that's a bit snappier today than it was yesterday. Her weekly feature, Smarterware, appears every Wednesday on Lifehacker. Subscribe to the Smarterware tag feed to get new installments in your newsreader.


Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Taking the $670 Volcano Vaporizer for a Test Drive

By Adam Frucci

When it comes to smoking, you can settle for a pipe or rolling papers. Or you can drop $670 on a Volcano Vaporizer, the king of all paraphernalia. We took one for a test run.

So what makes the Volcano so great that people spend close to $700 on one? Well, first of all, it looks pretty awesome. If you didn't know what it was, you'd think it was some sort of German-designed kitchen equipment, which isn't too far off.

Each Volcano is built by hand by a small German company using top-notch parts. It's got a classic design to it that will make you want to leave it out rather than hide it in a desk drawer. But that's not why you buy it. You buy it because it gets you high really well.

You simply pack some vaporizables into the heating chamber and pop that into your Volcano, which has a handy digital readout to let you decide exactly how hot you want it running (it still stays cool to the touch on the exterior). You then attach a vapor balloon to the top of the heating chamber. Over the course of about 30 seconds, it fills up with vapor (not smoke, mind you). You then snap on a mouthpiece and pass the balloon around. It all sounds more complicated than it is.

So why is that so great? Well, it's all about the vapor. The Volcano heats your vaporizables up, but not hot enough for combustion. That means all the nasty tar and toxins in your herbs don't get released, just the active ingredients and flavors you're looking for. What results is a healthier and cleaner-feeling experience. It also gets you high as shit.

So is it worth the cash? Well, not really. But if you're a serious smoker and you have cash to burn, you will almost definitely absolutely love this thing and want to use it every day, not just because of the great experience but because of how good it looks. But if spending $700 on something to smoke with seems like a ludicrous and insane thing to do on your budget, it most definitely is. But hey, not everyone can afford a Porsche, either.


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Friday, April 17, 2009

Giz Explains: The Difference Between $100 and $100,000 Speakers

A speaker system can cost as little as $35. Or as much as $350,000. As a normal person, you probably have just one question about speakers that cost as much a Ferrari: What. The. Hell.

How Speakers Work
Especially when you consider just how simple the overall mechanism behind a standard speaker is: It moves air. Essentially, what happens in a speaker—loudspeaker, to be technical—is that the alternating current from an amplifier runs to the speaker and through the voice coil (which is just, wait for it, a coil of wire) turning the coil into an electromagnet. That, in turns, creates a magnetic field between it and the permanent magnet in the driver. As the current alternates between positive and negative, the magnets are attracted and repulsed, moving the cone back and forth. Voila, it emits the soothing sounds of Bach or Korn. (Driver diagram from Wikipedia's unusually exceptional loudspeaker article.)

But that's probably not quite what you think of when you hear "speaker." You're probably thinking of a box with a circle thing and maybe a hole in it. That's actually a loudspeaker system, and it actually has more than one kind of speaker inside of it, called drivers. That's because the driver tuned to deliver high frequencies—a tweeter—ain't so good at delivering bass, which is why you need a woofer or subwoofer (low and lower). And then you've got mid-range speakers—for mid-range sounds—in higher-end systems. Your average GENERIC SPEAKER COMPANY set skips this middleman. So generally two or more drivers are stuffed in a box or cabinet, called an enclosure.

Lovely, but that doesn't explain what separates these $107,000 YG Acoustics Anat Reference II speakers from the $50 Logitech Z-2300s on my desk—which are even THX certified. So, we enlisted some help: Cnet's Audiophiliac Steve Guttenberg, who lives and breathes speakers ranging from the sensible to the ludicrous, and Paul DiComo and Matt Lyons, speaker guys who came from Polk and are now at Definitive Audio.

If you read our profile of Audiophile Maximo Michael Fremer "Why We Need Audiophiles," it probably won't surprise that when initially asked simply, "What the difference between ten dollar speakers and ten thousand dollar speakers?" the Definitive guys' initial answer was, "Well, it ought to be that they sound better." Even Steve told us, "You can't apply a Consumer Reports kind of index to something that's as subjective as audio quality."

No, but seriously.

The Goal of a Loudspeaker
A speaker's ultimate goal is "to sound like reality"—the elusive dragon that every audiophile chases—so on a broad, not-very-useful level, how close it comes to matching that reality is the difference between good and bad, expensive and cheap speakers. To be slightly more technical, the "spec" is clarity: The lower the distortion of the original sound it recreates, the better the speaker. In fact, basically every other spec, every confusing number you read on the side of a box is actually totally meaningless, according to both Steve and the Definitive guys. Steve singles out watts as "one of the more useless specifications ever created." If you have to look for a number when buying speakers, Steve said one that's "kind of useful" is sensitivity/efficiency, which would be something like 90dB @ 1 watt, which relates how loud a speaker will play at a given power level.

Three Characteristics
But when pressed, there are a few qualities Paul and Matt from Definitive singled out in amazing speakers—what they call the big three:
• More dynamic range, or simply the ability to play louder without sounding like trash as you crank the volume. With good speakers, you want to keep cranking it up, like accelerating a fast car.
• Better bass. That doesn't mean louder, "but better." It's more melodic, and not muddy—you can actually hear individual notes, an upright acoustic bass being plucked.
• "A very natural timbre." Timbre is the "tone color" or how natural the sound is—if you played the voice of someone you know on a speaker with excellent timbre, it would sound exactly like them. Or if two different instruments play the same note, you'd be able to tell them apart very easily and cleanly.

Beyond that, what audiophiles are looking for—which Mahoney alludes to in the audiophile profile—is a speaker's ability to create an image, the picture. That is, its ability to create a sense of three-dimensional sound. The defining problem of designing speakers, say the guys from Definitive, is that "physics is dogmatic." So every speaker is built around a set of compromises.

Size
To put that in some concrete—rather than seemingly religious—terms, you can't have a small speaker that sounds good. So one defining quality of six-figure speakers is that they are large. They have bigger woofers and tweeters. More surface area means better sound. There are also simply more drivers—every driver you add is like when you add another string to a guitar, to create a better-nuanced sound. So, for instance, a $300 speaker from a "quality manufacturer" you'll get a 5 1/4-inch woofer and a 1-inch tweeter. A $3000 pair of speakers might have two 5 1/4 mid-range drivers and then a 10-inch woofer.

Build Quality
Build quality is the other thing. A "dead box," or an enclosure that doesn't create any sounds of its own—since that's distortion—is key and something that costs a lot of money. You just want sound from the drivers themselves. The quality of the woofer and tweeter themselves, obviously, comes into play—their ability to handle more power, since that's what translates into volume.

At the extreme end, Steve says, they can just handle more power without breaking—as the copper wire inside heats up, it can deform or melt, and the driver gets messed up. Pricey speakers don't do that. In terms of exotic materials or construction, Steve mentioned ribbon tweeters, which are only in the highest-end speaker systems—they're "literally a piece of aluminum foil that's suspended between magnets that vibrates back and forth" producing excellent clarity. Better speakers also have intricate dividing networks to make sure the right signals go to the right place—they get more complicated as the price goes up.

Dollar Figures
So how much do you have to spend to get a good system in the eyes (ears?) of an audiophile? Definitive recommends $1000 for a home-theater component setup. (In other words, don't buy a home theater in a box.) You can also get a pretty decent pair of "neutral, natural sounding" speakers for $300—they "won't knock your ass" and won't be great as some things, but they'll be alright. There's no magic one-size-fits-all speaker system, however. It depends on the room and the situation. (If your couch is against a wall, skip the 7.1 surround, says Steve.) Heavier speakers tend to sound better than lighter ones, though that's not an absolute.

But what's the upper limit? Well, there isn't any. Paul from Definitive said he heard these $65,000 Krell Modulari Duo last month and "was mezmerized." It's like wine to oenophiles, Paul said. As Steve puts it most simply: "To people who are into it, it's worth it."

Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Ultimate Battle: The Snuggie vs. Slanket vs. Freedom Blanket vs. Blankoat

By Jason Chen

The Slanket, the Snuggie, the Freedom Blanket or the supremely expensive and extravagant Blankoat? This is the most important question of the millennium. You're about to know the answer.

Those who haven't seen the Snuggie ad or one of its many parodies and aren't aware of the blanket-with-sleeves phenomenon get no sympathy from us. Unless, you've just awoken from an eight-month coma, in which case: Welcome back! To recap, the Snuggie is the most famous and widely marketed of the many blanket-with-sleeves. The Freedom Blanket originated the idea, the Slanket followed up, and recently, the Blankoat decided to take it into a ridiculous dimension.

But which is the best for you? We tried each of them the way they were meant to be worn: on the sofa, lying down, with one fist buried in a bag of Doritos and the other cradling a bottle of beer. We gained thirty-five pounds, but it was so worth it.

And for those of you who think that the whole blanket-with-sleeves product could just as easily be accomplished with a robe worn backwards? We tested that too.


Snuggie


SnuggieSnuggie

Snuggie ($15): Don't buy this. Having the most ironic value contributes nothing to the final product when it's constructed out of material that's one step up from a papery hospital gown. Not only are the sleeves too cramped, the bottom part—the part that keeps your feet warm when you're lying down—isn't long enough for anyone of a decent height. I'm only 5' 10", and I have to bend my knees to keep all of my body covered. Bend them! This body wasn't constructed for that.

The Snuggie is also the most static-prone of all the blankets, and comes in such neon colors that surely are not found in nature. There's a reason why this is the cheapest of the bunch, which means you should only consider this if you have a plus-sized dog you want to dress up as a radioactive Superman. Krypto, if you will. Nobody else should buy it.

At $15, it's the cheapest

Can be conveniently found at many lousy stores

Generates a lot of static when being taken off

Thin, papery material

Too short for most people


Slanket


SlanketSlanket

Slanket ($38): The most expensive of the major three, the Slanket is where you turn when you want to make sure you get the best for your blanket money. It's 60 inches x 95 inches, so it's long enough even for people over 6 feet, and is made out of polyester microfibers, so it's soft and thick. Essentially, it's everything the Snuggie is not.

When someone asks why a regular blanket won't do, the Slanket is the answer. The sleeves are wizardy enough to keep you warm and allow enough space for maneuverability (gaming is the most prominent example). It has the most variety of colors choices—11 at my count—and is an example of the concept done right. If you're serious about staying warm while also keeping your hands one extra layer of material away from being able to fondle your genitals, this is it. [Slanket]

Very comfortable, very long, very usable

Comes in a wide variety of couch-matching colors

Most expensive of the 3 normal ones

Still generates a little static when removed


Freedom Blanket


Freedom BlanketFreedom Blanket

Freedom Blanket ($30): The original blanket with sleeves has become, unfortunately, lost between the media blitz of the Snuggie and the web-presence of the Slanket. But it shouldn't be. The price, $30, reflects exactly how the Freedom Blanket performs: somewhere in-between the Snuggie and the Slanket.

The Freedom Blanket isn't quite as comfortable as the Slanket, but comparing it to the Snuggie would be like comparing rubbing your face with a cotton towel to rubbing your face with Joaquin Phoenix's beard. At 72 inches, it's also longer than the Snuggie, but still falls slightly short of the Slanket's 95 inches. And that's pretty much the whole story.

If you don't want a piece of crap like the Snuggie but can't get over the fact that you're paying a couple Hamiltons for a blanket with sleeves, the Freedom Blanket is a good compromise. Plus, you'll sleep well knowing that you're supporting the people who actually invented the idea instead of someone who knows how to copy very well. [Freedom Blanket]

More comfortable than the Snuggie

Not quite as expensive as the Slanket

Also generates spouse-shocking static when removed

Slightly too short for tall people


Blankoat


BlankoatBlankoatBlankoatBlankoatBlankoatBlankoatBlankoatBlankoat


BlankoatBlankoatBlankoatBlankoat

Sruli Recht Blankoat ($330): The Blankoat is to the other three blankets as getting a full service massage is to setting your showerhead into massage mode. They may sound similar, but it's an entirely alien concept. If you have enough money to spend $330 on a gigantic 120-inch long blanket made out of wool from Icelandic sheep, you have enough money to run your heater and walk around in your underwear instead.

You know how wool sweaters are itchy? This is a wool sweater for your entire body. If you like wool, great—this will keep you very, very warm. If you don't, wearing this while watching an episode of America's Next Top Model is like an hour enduring Gitmo's mildest torture session.

But if your question is whether or not the Blankoat does its job, the answer is yes. With this much material, you can wrap yourself entirely inside the thing—including your head—with only a small hole left for your face. Having actually never lived in Iceland, or Boston, or anywhere where you actually have to physically move snow away so you can travel, I can't say whether the Blankoat would be worth the money in those situations. I imagine it would. But you're still paying $330, which is John Mayer money. [Blankoat]

Provides the most coverage of all the solutions

Wool is scratchy

It's $330!!


A Robe


RobeRobe

A Bathrobe ($42 or cheaper): You may already have one of these. You may also wonder why you can't just turn one backwards and be done with it. Two reasons. One, no robe is long enough to cover your feet. People don't enjoy falling down repeatedly when going for a drink of water. Two, the sleeves aren't long enough to provide adequate coverage like all of the above options (save for the Snuggie). [Low-priced bathrobe on Amazon]

You may already own one, in which case it's free

Doesn't cover your feet when lying down, doesn't cover your arms adequately

Here's what you should take away. Get the Slanket if you're serious about staying warm while lying on your couch, the Freedom Blanket if you're not. Nobody anywhere should buy the Snuggie. The Blankoat is for rich people who can afford Icelandic wool. Bathrobes do not work, no matter how much you wish them to.

Thank you, Snuggie, for raising blanket-with-sleeves awareness. Now get out.