Zazzle Shop

Screen printing
Showing posts with label Victoria in Twilight. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Victoria in Twilight. Show all posts

Friday, July 31, 2009

Ron Howard’s daughter takes on The Twilight Saga: Eclipse!

by Quaid

Sorry Rachelle Lefevre, there’s a new “Victoria” in town. She’s hot, she’s well-known, and she’s the daughter of a highly successful director and child star.

Bryce4That’s right, Bryce Dallas Howard is jumping into the Twilight saga starting with Eclipse. The actress will portray “Victoria,” a role played by Lefevre in both Twilight and the upcoming New Moon.

I can hear the public outcry now, only there was so little character development in the first movie that I doubt anyone but the most hardcore of hardcore fans will notice Rachelle’s absence.

Why do this, Bryce? After starring in McG’s ultra-sucky Terminator movie, did you say to yourself “Fuck it, I’m going to try and land supporting roles in as many shitty blockbuster franchises as possible”? I mean, will you be replacing Megan Fox in the next Transformers movie, too?

Or Shia? Actually, that would be kind of hot.

Summit Entertainment executive Erik Feig says:

“We are incredibly happy that Bryce has agreed to come into the franchise. Rachelle brought “Victoria” to great screen life and Bryce will bring a new dimension to the character. The franchise is lucky to have such a talented actress as Bryce coming in to fill the role.”

Translation:

Thank Christ we can finally afford a name actor! At first we had to hire all these no-names that have no box-office draw, but now that we’re making money we can shit-can these dedicated actors and bring in some fucking movie stars. FUCK YOU RACHELLE!”

Then again, that’s just speculation on my part. Apologies on the language. I obviously feel very passionately about this.

And now, gratuitous pictures.