Top 10 Best Video Games For Couples

By Merritt Martin

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I'm coming out of the first three months of shacking up with my boy. We're still learning each other's quirks. Some things about the boy are excellent: He makes a great sandwich, he--without complaint and often without being asked--brings me cold, bedside water, he has no problem that my feet are essentially 'bergs that gravitate toward his lava-like legs at 3 a.m. But there's one thing that's forced me to do some research: He plays one-person video games. They require him to fight off scavengers after a nuclear holocaust (Fallout 3's music is cool, but I'm OVER it), unite with blood elfs and perform excessive tasks for other people (because I want to watch him run errands during World of Warcraft), and drive a badass race car when I can't (GRID is so not fair).

So, I took it upon myself to trade in some games of my own, ask some pro gamers I know for help and appeal to my boy's desire to please to find some rather awesome games that we can play together. Because as much as I want him to have fun playing his games, he's got plenty of time for that--and it's not when I'm cuddled up next to him...with a controller in my hands ready and willing to kick his ass*. Digitally speaking, of course.

*Keep in mind, I may use boy-girl talk, but that's because it's my experience. These games can rock for girl-on-girl and guy-on-guy video fun times too. And that's not nearly as dirty as it sounds ...unless you do it naked, which is totally an option, no matter how you couple up.

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10. Guitar Hero (PS3/Wii/X360)

Easy pick, but Guitar Hero is excellent for the gamer who's gradually bringing a non-player into his world. When I asked my gamer friend, VicTwenty (I'll use his gamer tag, because I think he'd like that) his thoughts on this list, he went right to da Hero. It's fun, it's silly, it provides an easy common bond and neither of you need musical experience to play. And if one of you happens to actually play bass or guitar in real life, well, this just evens things out since that actually makes it harder to play Guitar Hero (according to my boy who says that it makes no sense on any level below hard). The two of you can jam out together, swapping between parts each song, throwing the rock sign and kicking like the Wilson sisters when appropriate. From experience, Aerosmith and Metallica can prove way more challenging than expected, but singing along while trying to play can incite huge belly laughs. Also, how funny is it to see what heavy metal avatar your S.O. will pick? It's never who you expect... Go Judy Nails!

9. Lego Games (PS3/Wii/X360)

From Indiana Jones, to Harry Potter, to Star Wars, the Lego franchise is badass for creating two-player storyline games that couples can play simultaneously. Some complaints have been that tasks can be a little repetitive, but given that you're actually achieving stuff and moving through a challenge, it's fairly forgivable. VicTwenty also offered these games as another suggestion for the gamers-at-different-levels issue. Characters we all know and give a shit about also help. And it's not like anyone ever hated a Lego.

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8. TIE: Wii Sports/Resort (Wii) and FIFA Soccer 09 (PS3/Wii/X360)

OK, so shoot me, I'm lumping the sports games together. But that's only so I can talk about both and not leave a really awesome game out. Basically, Wii Sports is great for peeps who actually want to get up off of the couch when they play a game (not as much off the couch as Wii Fit, but a little). "Play" tennis, baseball, golf, bowling or boxing, using the remote and occasionally a nunchuck, depending on the game. You could box your boyfriend without laying a hand on him. You could strike out your girlfriend without knocking her to the mound. It's fun--especially for couples of varying size who could never actually participate in certain sports together ... which is kind of a strange bonus, but is actually valid. Resort includes swordplay, wakeboarding, Frisbee, cycling (so strange) and more. Now, FIFA is different. This is a sit-down, pick out the team, switch from player to player, and maybe organize a tournament situation. Great for when you and your partner are both fans of a particular sport, or for when you're trying to convey just how awesome soccer really is (because it is truly awesome) and you really can't stand John Madden's voice no matter how much fun it is to play video game football. As with most pro sport games, you can pit dream teams against each other or play actual line-ups and historical rivalries (Chelsea FC or ManU?).

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7. Hasbro Family Game Night (Wii/X360)

So maybe you like board games but your partner digs on the video. Meet in the middle. Thus far, our favorite of the suite (which also offers Connect Four, Battleship, Sorry, Sorry Sliders and Boggle--and is hosted by Mr. Potato Head) is Yahtzee, since he gets a few poker-like challenges and, well, I just love a satisfying dice game. Plus, unlike Battleship, you don't have to look away when the other person plays. The huge bonus with the Game Night suite though, is that you never lose pieces or run out of the pads that come with board games, and there is no passive-aggressive conflict a week after playing, concerning who should put up the game box. Because that happens. It really does. And it's never pretty.

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6. Mario Kart (Wii)

Everyone loves a good driving game. Why not play a driving game where, instead of having to go to the bowling alley and bully tweens out of the Need For Speed driver seats just to use a steering wheel and play against each other, you can simply hold up a clean white one on your couch and drive go-karts and motorcycles while throwing banana peels, squid ink and other weird shit at each other ... or your enemies--but you know you're totally throwing it at each other. The vehicles are fun, the characters are old familiars we all love (except the Princess, with her holier-than-thou attitude--what an asshole), and the various levels are diverse and fun. Well, except that twisty, turny Rainbow Road. That level can eat a dick.

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5. Noby Noby Boy (PS3)

Now, I'll be honest, I was thinking Katamari Damacy (PS2) for this position, but then my buddy Sam Machkovech, games critic for The Escapist and The Stranger, set me straight. "It's only $5, and if you thought the guy who made Katamari Damacy couldn't get weirder, well, holy crap." Sam went on to entice with this: "The two of you control rainbow-colored worms, and all they can do in this 'game' is walk around, eat the world's citizens, then poop them out as if your butts are rifles. No point or purpose--just silly. As a bonus, see what happens when you eat and fart your boyfriend or girlfriend." Um, SOLD. This one is really great for the super-competitive, grudge-holding couple. There's nothing to compete for but who's laughing harder.

4. Contra (NES)

What? Did I just go Nintendo Classic on your asses? Yeah, I totally did. You know why? Because from the first time I ever played Contra with my best friend back in the day, I knew it was the perfect two-player shoot-the-aliens game in the world. It's simple, it moves from right to left. You're both working for the same goal, which means you can cuss out the bastards together and warn each other of evildoers looming in the brush. Plus, with a little of the ol' up-up-down-down-left-right-left-right-B-A-select-start on the opening screen, you and your hunny-bunny can revisit that classic shit with 99 lives. That's right, bitches! I know the code! There will be many high five's. Contra never say die! Someday, I want to play this game while eating room service on my honeymoon. Followed by Rad Racer. There, I said it.

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3. TIE: Peggle (X360) and Bust-A-Move (various incarnations for various platforms)

Both of these ball-shooting games seem simple in concept, and are relatively easy to play--to begin with. This means that those fairly unfamiliar to video games will have no trouble aiming and shooting, but those who feel they're bad asses may be quickly schooled and knocked down to size should their newbie S.O. have the wiring for aim and strategy. Likewise, two skilled players could own each other back and forth on both, keeping things interesting. A warning, however: For such an innocent-looking game (shoot a colored ball at like-colored balls to make them disappear from your side and show up on your opponent's), Bust-A-Move has caused some of the most intense insults ever to come from a seemingly mild-mannered person. The tension created from lining up shots before a slew of balls is added to your play area is crazy. It can become entirely too intense for super-competitive couples, but incredibly fun for those who are just really into playing games for fun. Peggle, on the other hand, is like a cross between B-A-M and pachinko, so more is left to chance, but you still get the zany cartoon characters with special powers. Basically, if your couple falls into the paranoid "the game is against me" category, go with B-A-M; if your couple falls into the "he's/she's against me" camp, go with Peggle. Either way, you get to play with balls.

2. House of the Dead: Overkill (Wii)

Game critic Sam Machkovech rocked his suggestion again with this one. He promised me "point-and-shoot zombie killin'" in what he said was a top-notch gun game. I like gun games and zombies, and, well, based on the boy's penchant for Fallout 3, it sounds about right. But Sam couldn't have been more right when he said, "The dialogue and cut scenes are campy, exploitation-era delights that pair well with a case of PBR and a laughing S.O." Get out of my head! Just be aware that if you're not paying close attention, you might try to drink your Wiimote and wand your beer. Not that there's anything wrong with that, G.

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1. Geometry Wars: Retro Evolved 2 (X360)

Combine Galaga, Centipede and any other awesome space-themed arcade game from the '80s and you have Geometry Wars. Play competitive or co-op, depending on if you want to speak to each other later. The gist is that using your toggles, you drive your craft and shoot your enemies. Seems simple, except for the fact that said enemies just keep coming at you. Or time is running out. Or you only have one bomb left. Or you're in the mode where you can only shoot from within the circles. It sounds overwhelming and it is. But it's also totally amazing and addictive. You'll say, "Just one more round and then we'll go to bed" about seven times and love every minute of it. Skilled gamers of the first-person shooter variety (the boy) may need just as much time as those of the puzzle type (myself) to get the hang of this one, which really makes things fun. Go download it right now via Xbox Live Arcade. Just don't download the mobile version and play it at work, during dinner, during quiet moments alone together or while driving.