Disabled stripper wants Constitutional right to White Castle Slyders

By Kevin Hoffman in Food Funnies

Yesterday, the Star Tribune's Whistleblower exposed a grave injustice on the front of the Sunday edition: Ariel Wade, a wheelchair-bound ex-stripper, can't drive her mobility scooter through the White Castle drivethru at 11 p.m. when she wants delicious mini-cheeseburgers.

Like all sensible fast food restaurants, White Castle only allows automotive vehicles in the drivethru, for fear that someone like Wade would get run over by an SUV.

But Wade says that's discrimination against the disabled, because the drivethru stays open one hour later than the dining room, and she has a Constitutional right to life, liberty, and late-night Slyders.

White Castle tried to mollify her with coupons, but she immediately went out to sue, and she may actually win:

The Minnesota Disability Law Center is weighing whether to take on Wade's case, said Justin Page, a staff attorney. It's an "unsettled" area of law, with few cases testing the issue, he said. But on first glance, the policy strikes Page as inconsistent with the Americans with Disabilities Act.

"I would argue if you're open 24 hours, you need to be accessible and provide accessibility 24 hours," Page said.